Alright, listen up, y’all. We’re gonna talk about this here… “athletics” and “royals.” Don’t rightly know what all that fancy stuff means, but it’s got somethin’ to do with them fellas hittin’ a ball and runnin’ around. Sounds like a whole lotta fuss to me, but folks seem to get all worked up about it.
Now, from what I hear, these “royals,” they play in some place called “Kauffman Stadium.” Sounds like a big ol’ place. And them “athletics,” they come and play against ’em. They say it’s a “matchup,” like two roosters in a cockfight, I guess.
These games, they happen all the time. They had one on May 18th, another on the 19th, and they got another one comin’ up on June 18th. Seems like they just keep on playin’. Don’t they ever get tired? Land sakes, I get tired just thinkin’ about it.
They got these fellas called “pitchers.” One of ’em for the “royals” is named Alec Marsh, they say he’s pretty good, got a “5-3” or somethin’. And for the “athletics” there’s this Hogan Harris fella. They throw that ball real hard, trying to trick the other fellas into swingin’ and missin’. It’s like tryin’ to catch a greased pig, I tell ya.
- They play at night, mostly. They say 7:10 PM “ET.” Don’t know what that “ET” means, but it sounds late to me. Should be home in bed, not chasin’ after a ball.
- And they keep track of all sorts of things. “Batting averages” they call it. How many times a fella hits the ball, I reckon. And “strikezone info,” which I guess is where that ball has to go. Too much thinkin’ for my taste.
- They got this fella Jeff Montgomery, used to play for the “royals.” They say he was good at savin’ games. Don’t know how you save a game, seems like it’s already happened once they played it. But he musta been somethin’ special.
They also got these things called “box scores.” I seen ‘em in the newspaper sometimes, all them numbers and letters jumbled together. Can’t make heads or tails of it, myself. Looks like chicken scratch to me.
Seems like a whole lot of fuss over nothin’, if you ask me. But folks, they get all riled up about it. Cheerin’ and hollerin’, wearin’ them funny hats and shirts with the teams’ names on ‘em. I guess it gives ‘em somethin’ to do. Better than sittin’ around and twiddlin’ your thumbs, I suppose.
Anyway, that’s what I know about these “athletics” and “royals.” They play ball, they got pitchers, and they keep track of all sorts of numbers. And folks seem to like watchin’ ‘em do it. More power to ‘em, I say. Me, I’d rather be in my garden, tendin’ to my tomatoes. At least I know what I’m gettin’ with them.
Now, don’t go askin’ me who’s gonna win or who’s the best. I ain’t got a clue. Just tellin’ ya what I heard. You wanna know more, you go ask them fellas wearin’ them funny hats. They seem to know it all.
So there you have it. Athletics vs. Royals. Just a bunch of fellas hittin’ a ball and runnin’ around. And a whole lotta folks makin’ a big deal out of it.
Tags: [MLB, Kansas City Royals, Oakland Athletics, Baseball, Sports, Kauffman Stadium, Alec Marsh, Hogan Harris, Jeff Montgomery, Pitchers]